Love Is In The Air! 02/14/2011
Rusty and I have reached a stage in life where romance is defined so differently than when we first met. . . as you age and life happens, you simply appreciate a comfortableness that occurs with couples who have been through some stuff. So we find romance in the little things . . . a simple text exchanged in the middle of the day, an impromptu dinner out, a ride in the country scoping out flowers for a family function. I know! I know! It doesn't seem very exciting, does it? But love and commitment aren't always exciting. There are life changes--job stresses; caring for and in our case, losing our parents; children leaving the nest; keeping up a house; and on it goes. But along with the hum-drum things that come our way come some amazing surprises! And this Valentine's Day, we got one of the best! We were so excited to hear from Emily last Friday when she called to ask our plans for the following night. Since my boys are deploying this week, her reason for the visit was to catch up with them before they left the country. Because there are so many things to be done in preparation for their departure, I cautioned Emily we may not get everyone together, but assured her that we would have a good time even if it was just the four of us. Emily and Jeff got to our house around 6:30 PM just as I was putting the finishing touches on my makeup and plugging in the curling iron to do my hair. Rusty called out to me, "Come here!" I thought to myself, "This is stupid! I know they're here, and I'll be ready in two shakes!" "Give me a minute!" I said "Emily said you needed to come here!" he said a little louder. I mumbled, a little annoyed at the interruption but so happy to see Emily and Jeff. I ran my fingers through my hair and walked into the den were Emily and Jeff were facing Rusty as if they were waiting for some profound message from him. Expressionless faces . . . just standing and sort of staring with this blank look although I did detect a little bit of a grin on Jeff's face. In his hand, Rusty held a red envelope and said that Emily had a Valentine's card for the two of us that we were to open together. Neither of us had our glasses so we couldn't read the darn thing, and as I took a couple of steps to the coffee table to retrieve mine, it hit me! There was a little more to this card than a simple gesture . . . We're having a baby in our family! It's been about three years since we got one of these unexpected surprises, and as far as romantic evenings go, this night was one of the best ever! There is nothing in the entire world quite as romantic as watching the circle of life repeat itself in your children! I can only compare it to that walking on air feeling you get with your first big crush . . . ah, but this is soooo much better. And even this doesn't compare to the day in October when we welcome Baby Brown into our hearts and our family! Happy Valentine's Day! Add Comment Friends and Lovers 05/07/2010
For several months now, our family has been busy with preparations for the wedding of my husband Rusty's only child, Emily. She and fiancé Jeff have been a couple for about seven years, and as we've gotten to know Jeff, we've all decided he's a pretty great guy. As word has gotten out that there will soon be a new marriage in our family, people have asked about the wedding and the man Emily is marrying. My standard reply is usually something like “Emily and Jeff are so compatible and I’m very happy for them.” My response is not a pat answer--it's sincere because I really do believe they are a perfect fit for one another. They started their relationship as friends in high school and that friendship was cultivated until it eventually blossomed into a romance. And I believe that strong friendships often make for the best long-term relationships. Marriage shouldn’t force you to give up the friendship part of your relationship. Your spouse should be your best friend. I saw a quote the other day, and it makes a good point about what marriage should be: “If there is such a thing as a good marriage, it is because it resembles friendship rather than love.” My wish for Jeff and Emily is that as their relationship becomes more intimate that they will maintain the thing that brought them together in the first place—friendship! Your best friend is the person who still loves you—warts and all. Your best friend liked you (like is way more important than love in my book) before you even tried to impress them in a manner that you hoped would eventually win their love. Friendship is what will sustain you during the hard times, and it will compel you to turn to one another during times of great joy and during times of unbelievable sadness. A great friendship is a place of refuge. Just like home, it’s the place you want to be in times of celebration and in times of frustration. Frederick W. Robertson said, “Home is the one place in all this world where hearts are sure of each other. It is the place of confidence. It is the place where we tear off that mask of guarded and suspicious coldness which the world forces us to wear in self-defense, and where we pour out the unreserved communications of full and confiding hearts. It is the spot where expressions of tenderness gush out without any sensation of awkwardness and without any dread of ridicule.” Doesn’t that describe a phenomenal friendship equally as well? And to have a marriage that includes all of these things—freedom to be who we are, the ability to communicate everything in our hearts, to love and be loved without the slightest hint of self-consciousness—WOW! So to Emily and Jeff, the friends who have become lovers, may you have a marriage that is all of these things and more. See You at the Rainbow's End? 04/17/2010
As a child, I loved to sing--still do. I was one of those little girls with a soft, sweet voice and I picked up a lot of songs from Mama--songs she sang around the house as she puttered about cleaning and cooking. Other songs, I picked up from my aunts who all have beautiful voices. It's true--the Lane family is gifted with talent, especially singing. I remember my first solo in church . . . it was during a Christmas play, and while I don't remember the song, I have a vivid picture in my mind still. I must have been four or five, and I can see myself standing at the front of the left side of pews in the little country church. There was a Christmas tree in the middle and to the right, there was a huge oil heater. My hair was long and dark with just a hint of a flip at the ends. For my part in the holiday pageant, I wore pajamas. They were white with pink flowers--the kind with the feet in them. And I held a teddy bear in my chubby, little arms. It's funny how that picture in my head has always had a strong resemblance to my granddaughter Brennyn. When I look at her now, the memory of myself that Christmas often comes to mind. I do not remember being afraid or bashful, although I was pretty shy in those days. But I remember the people in the congregation smiling. Big smiles! I don't remember seeing anyone in my family among the crowd. I know they were there, but I suppose Mama was running around in the back somewhere making things happen as was her habit. As my Aunt Mary would say, Mama was "a doer." Most of my later stage appearances happened at Floyd Dale Elementary School. As a second grader, one of our favorite activities during recess was playing beauty pageant. Miss America was a really big deal in those days and since the girls outnumbered the boys, we won out and the boys were the judges. One of the low tables that served as desks for us wee ones was our make-shift stage, and the child-sized chairs were positioned--one on each end--to enable us to step onto the runway. Of course, the only segments of the pageant that we did were the interview portion and the talent competition. To this day, I am kidded about my selection for the talent portion . . . I always chose to sing "Moon River!" Always! This song I learned from my cousin Jo Ellen who is a couple of years older than I am. Her parents lived "in the city (Florence)", and were much younger than my parents. So the songs she heard were a little more current than my repertoire. I still remember her sitting in the front porch swing at Grandma and Granddaddy Lane's house singing "Moon River." I didn't have a clue what the words meant, but I was completely enchanted with the song. And I had no idea there was a movie called "Breakfast at Tiffany's" or that Audrey Hepburn sang the famous song as part of her role. Heck, I didn't even know there was anybody named Audrey Hepburn! The only person I had ever heard sing the song--other than Jo Ellen--was Andy Williams. Still, I loved the song--and I do to this day. Today, I came across a quote from Audrey Hepburn. Her advice was so wise that I felt it needed to be shared . . . For attractive lips, speak words of kindness. For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people. For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry. For beautiful hair, let a child run his fingers through it once a day. For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone. Like little girls in a beauty pageant, we often judge ourselves--and others--by how they look or what they accomplish. As for me, I'd like to be judged for my kindness. I'd like to be known as someone who looks for the good in people. I want to be remembered as a woman who shared her blessings with those less fortunate--not a woman who carried around extra pounds for a big part of her adult life. Aaaahh, to have children run their fingers through my hair every day is one thing that I know makes me feel beautiful. Who cares how my hair looks when they're done twirling and mussing it? I know that their little eyes see beauty. And now, more than 40 years after playing make believe as a contender for a crown, I have the poise of a queen. I have the knowledge that I never walk alone because Jesus walks beside me. Are we after the same rainbow's end, my friends? I sure hope so! |
